I was headed to LA from Vegas when I realized revenge of Montezuma was about to attack my rear end. See I ate at Chili's shortly before and my plain ignorance led me to believe my tummy rumbles were nothing more then stinky gas... Boy was I wrong!!! I pulled off the freeway in a hurry, clenching my cheeks as hard as I could to avoid the inevitable mess that was going to end up somewhere. Preferably in some porcelain. I waddled like a penguin quickly through the lobby while sweat pour from my forehead. I am sure all of us in these moments feel like time is in slow motion and all the while wondering if human nature will strike in front of all the little grannies trying to make a buck on the slots or if we will get a touch down on the kings thrown! I found the restrooms quickly as the signs were big, bright and clearly marked. I quickly entered the first stall with no time to lock the door. Montezuma was angry and nothing was slowing down her arrival. TOUCHDOWN! SUCCESS! The porcelain thrown was fed hefty servings at my relief and what a relief it was! What would I have done if not for Whiskey Pete's??? I'm afraid a thorny cactus would have been my alternative... After a long cleansing session I decided to reflect on my near death experience in the comfort of a slot machine. My twenty dollars was quickly turned into $300, so I cashed out and ran. Now you guys to tell me who else allows you to dookie and take $300 and still welcomes you back next time with open arms? Thank you Whiskey Pete's! You are my hero! PS... Please get Charmin for next time :D